There are a few wrong with it. That's said, a father changing his daughter’s diapers is as wrong as a mother changing her son’s diapers.
Societal viewpoint on parenting in the 16th century, “Child rearing and caring is the sole responsibility of a mother. There’s no way a father can do it efficiently.”
Societal viewpoint on parenting in the 21st century, “A mother knows how to raise a child well as they acquire a motherly instinct as soon as the child is born whereas a father does not go through this shift. So, he is not the right person to raise his child.”
Did you see the difference? Yeah? Me too, but only in the era. We, as a society, are just progressing in times, not in our minds. The same redundant thoughts on gender roles have kept us from growing. Men should go out and earn a livelihood and women should take care of the family needs by staying back at home.
The same methods of duty-segregation got mapped onto the present generation. Men should go out for work and earn money and women should cook food and change their kids’ diapers. Men changing nappies are considered less manly. And sometimes it is a taboo too: when a father has to change his daughters’ diapers. If this sounds strange even to you, keep on reading for all the contemplations summarized, based on what other parents think about the whole debate.
Can a mother change her son’s diaper?
Before addressing the gender-biased question of the appropriateness of a father changing a daughter’s diaper, the first answer that most of the parents come up with is rather another counter-question: Is it right if a mother changes her son’s diaper then?
If the reason for not doing it is a fear that you might hurt your baby as you are not aware of the cleaning technique of the private parts of the opposite gender, then the concept is justifiable. But if this whole thing zeroes down to the morality of the issue and it being wrong, we need to rethink.
A mother changing her son’s diapers is just the natural care of a parent for his baby. And it is and should be that way only in the case of a father doing the same for his daughter.
Why shouldn’t a father change his daughter’s diaper?
Our kids are a part of our being. A man and a woman equally contribute to conceiving a baby. So, seeing your babies naked is just an innocent thing in child-rearing. Many fathers are actively sharing the responsibilities of child-care as they feel it is their duty as well as their right. This is certainly true barring some situations.
Fear of doing it the wrong way
Many fathers are just afraid of changing their daughters’ diapers as she is of a different gender. The gender bothers them only because they don’t know the hygiene process of females and are afraid of accidentally hurting their baby girl. This surely makes sense though. If this is your issue too, it can surely be addressed with the help of the mother of the child. Learn the wiping and cleaning of baby’s genitals and do it under the guidance of your wife a few times. Once you learn it properly, your fear will go away.
Fear of inappropriate thoughts
A little baby, a boy or a girl, do not have private parts. They aren’t sexually developed beings and hence, seeing them naked shouldn’t be a concern for a normal parent. But our society is filled with many twisted minds and if you think that your husband or boyfriend thinks inappropriately about your baby girl, he shouldn’t be let near your daughter, leave alone the personal care. Anybody telling you he might or he gets sexual thoughts changing his infant or toddler daughters’ diapers needs medical attention.
Why a father MUST change his daughter’s diapers?
Private parts of your kids should never decide which parent should be assigned the diaper duty. It is just like a mother caring for her baby girl only and father for his baby boy. This is quite unnatural and unfair. In fact, fathers must help in all the child-care activities including the diaper duty for all the legitimate reasons.
To form a strong bond
Traditionally, fathers have never been close to their kids and nobody got into the depth of this thought. They simply never have been able to spend time with their kids and hence, that love-bond never formed. As opposed to this, mothers have always been the first ones a child runs to when he is in trouble. But breaking this stereotype would help fathers form this bond with their kids, especially daughters. The sons are, somehow, able to bond with dads later in their teens or 20s as fathers know the best how to solve their ‘boys issues’.
To invoke ‘father-instinct’
We all have been hearing about the mother-instinct from ages but nobody ever thought about how it is formed and why fathers don’t have that instinct. To that first question of how motherly instinct is formed: when a mother holds the naked baby close to her bare skin, the skin-to-skin contact helps to develop a certain kind of bond. This bond is so strong between the child and the parent, a mother-instinct is born. Now coming to the second question of missing father-instinct, the only answer is - fathers never tried to make that kind of bond with their kids. Research published in the journal ‘Birth’ has proven the invocation of this father-instinct if fathers try. Also, it will help you knock the lights out of the goons messing up with your baby girl when she’s all grown up and shy to tell you such stuff, because ‘you will just know’.
Final Words
The modern dads are all about being a hands-on father. They don’t shy away from manning up to do anything for their kids. They just don’t want the same wall between their kids and them which has been there between them and their parents. And when we say kids, daughters are also their extension and abandoning them just because they are a different gender than yours’ is nothing but inhumane. And, lastly, does this even look moral?